Translation 2

[ThachThao]

I agree with carolton totally.

I think you have the right idea. Translating English into Vietnamese will obviously help improve your reading skill. However, translating Vietnamese into English, in my opinion, will improve your writing and speaking capabilities since it will force you to think in English, a habit that most new learners need to develop. In addition, English grammar and vocabulary are much more structured; thus our mistakes will become more prominent, which is exactly what we need in order to make the necessary corrections.

But your Vietnamese writing here is rather obscure due to complex & probably vague thoughts, which makes it quite difficult to translate. I tried the first paragraph and had a tough time deciphering what it meant.

In Vietnamese
Tiếng nhạc buồn du dương từ cây đàn piano. Những lời nhạc buồn đầy ý nghĩa. Xung quanh rất nhiều người, nhưng bạn chẳng nghe lao xao ồn, vì tiếng nhạc ấy đã át đi tất cả. Ngọn nến tỏa ra ánh sáng lung linh từ chiếc bình gốm nhỏ giữa không gian nửa huyễn hoặc, mơ hồ của đêm tối, nửa mờ ảo của những ngọn đèn nho nhỏ. Nhưng nếu chỉ tập trung nhìn vào ngọn nến ấy, bạn thấy mọi thứ thật bừng sáng. Tập trung nhìn vào nến, bạn suy nghĩ nhiều điều trong tâm tưởng. Người bên cạnh cũng chẳng biết bạn nghĩ suy điều gì. Thấy đơn độc...

Your translation with its English corrected
The melodious music was from (a) the piano with meaningful blue lyrics. There were many people around but no noise could be heard because the music drowned out the noise. The sparkling light shone from a red candle in a small ceramic jar among vague dark space and ambiguous tiny lights. Looking at the candle, you saw everything brightened. Focusing on the candle, you were in your own imagined world with various thoughts. The person on your side did not know what you were thinking, but felt lonely ... (this means the person next to you felt lonely, not you)
(also you did not completely translate the middle part: nửa huyễn hoặc, mơ hồ của đêm tối, nửa mờ ảo)

A possible translation
The sad melody was coming from the piano, its blue lyrics rich with meaning. Fully surrounded by people, yet you hardly heard their chattering, which was probably drowned out by the music. From a small ceramic jar hanging above, light from a red candle flickered, conjuring up an image that was somewhat illusory and vague from the dark space, and somewhat shadowy from the tiny lamps nearby. Just looking intently at the candle light, however, you felt everything around was lighted up. Focusing on the candle, you had many deep thoughts. The person next to you probably wouldn’t know what were on your mind. (You) Felt lonely.

Cháu cảm ơn chú Sang ạ.
Ở đoạn cuối, cháu muốn miêu tả tâm trạng của người bên cạnh. Người đó buồn khi không có được sự chia sẻ những suy nghĩ từ người đang ngắm ngọn nến kia ạ.

[ThachThao]

Sorry ThachThao about my misunderstanding. Your post was long and I didn't read the title in which you wanted to translate from Vietnamese into English. I know you want to practice your English. May I suggest translating material like those which you had been doing earlier, short news articles, or history. Because those things are very direct and straightforward. The difficult thing about translating literature is that everyone has their own version of translation according to their interpretation of the work, preferred word usage, vocabulary, knowledge of grammar, tone, style, etc. You should not attempt literature translation until your English is very good, if not excellent. I believe Sang56 has posted a new translation piece for you or anyone else who wants to try to work on.

Thanks Ms. Carolton. I will continue to practice translating short paragraph.

[sang56]

làm ơn dịch giúp em :"During the floods the water overflows its riverbanks and soaks the surrounding land with rich fertile nutrients. "

dịch giùm em từ :" theo tôi " ( giống như là theo tôi thì làm như t hế này hay thề khác ấy )

:"During the floods the water overflows its riverbanks and soaks the surrounding land with rich fertile nutrients. "
Vào những cơn lụt, nước sông tràn lên khỏi bờ và thấm vào đất xung quanh với những chất dinh dưỡng màu mỡ.

dịch giùm em từ :" theo tôi " ( giống như là theo tôi thì làm như t hế này hay thề khác ấy ): Có nhiều cách: "According to me" , "In my opinion" , "I think", "From my point of view"

[sang56]

Dating from 4500 years ago
dịch là vào khoảng 4500 năm trước hả mấy anh chị ?

to date something thường có nghĩa là dùng máy để định tuổi (thời gian đã trôi qua) của vật đó, như carbon dating (dùng carbon 14 isotope để đoán tuổi)
Dating from 4500 years ago có thể tạm dịch là "được định là vào khoảng 4500 năm trước"